Modern Family Quotes from "Boy's Night"

Cam and Mitchell have a gay night out, Haley babysits, and Phil and Claire confront their old, weird neighbor.  Nathan Lane guest stars.

Manny:  Hump Day, am I right Jay?

Manny:  Are the movie right available for that one?

Phil: Testosterone vs. Estrogen.

Phil: Yep, I'm not going over there.

Phil: Mr. Clezak is not a nice person.

Mitchell:  Saturday we are having dinner with Pepper, Longines, and Crispin. Our "Home Boys"

Cam: You mean "Homo Boys"

Cam: Haley is a sweet and fashionable girl.

Cam:  We'll just pop over to the Orient and get another one.

Luke:  We have oxygen, but we don't need tanks.

Claire: Honey, you have to stop watching the news.

Phil:  That and anything set with the backdrop of competitive cheerleader.

Phil: Now, it's so dark.

Haley: You just go and get your gay on.

Phil: I thought we were singing Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons.

Phil:  I'm going to walk like a man, fast as I can, right to that bar over there.  If you knew Frankie Valli, you'd be laughing right now.

Cam:  Richard Gere, I'll be the officer, don't be a gentleman.

Michell:  he doesn't know I'm this gay.

Longines:  He looks like that dentist you hooked up with in Laguna.

Jay:  Your name is Longines?

Longines:  I know, I never had a shot.

Mr. Clezak:  You're the guy who just broke into my house and fondled me.

Phil:  Oh God, he's seen my sexy dance!

Jay:  You're better than that Crispin.

Crispin:  Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder.

Haley:  Maybe you think I'm shaped like a boy.

Jay:  You've never seen me a shower.  Don't go there.

Mitchell:  Rob Lowe!

Cam:  Where?

Haley:  They're gay, they know what shoes they own!

Pepper:  I hope you like blueberry scones and ...

Michell:  Give Pepper a big kiss for me.

Gloria:  That's someone's name, Pepper?

Pepper:  It's 2 hours not including our stop at the outlet mall.

Pepper:  How rich are you?

Mr. Clezak  Don't go throwing any parades, their onions.

Phil:  This so sweet.

Mr. Clezak:  Just don't start dancing.

Cam:  Are you talking about Rob Lowe?

Mitchell:  I think his good looks held him back.

Haley:  You were invading my 1st Amendment right to privacy.