The Big Bang Theory Quotes from "The Ornithophobia Diffusion"

Are Leonard and Penny back on?  Shelton is afraid of birds.

Here are the quotes:

Penny: What are you and Professor Fussy face up to tonight?

Leonard: Star Wars on Blue Ray.

Leonard: He's smart and crazy.  He may have created a monster!

Sheldon: It's called Ornithophobia.

Sheldon: Attention is what birds want.

Sheldon: Please, that's a seagull.

Sheldon: I'd like to report a dangerous wild animal.  A blue jay.

Leonard: An hour and a half of beach houses in the rain.

Leonard: I'd love to shoe shopping with you.

Leonard; You would've slept with me after a 3-hour documentary on dams?

Howard: if we don't start soon,  George Lucas is going to change it again.

Sheldon: Hummingbirds are the vampires of the flower world.

Sheldon: Age 16, a parrot in a pet store calls me fat ass!

Raj: That is one tough birdie.

Penny: I'd like an order of fries.

Leonard: That will be $5.00.

Penny: I hope Alex gets crabs: The Movie

Sheldon: This isn't a terrifying bird like a swan or  a goose.

Sheldon: Burn the apartment, burn the apartment!

Leonard: You're kidding me.

Penny: With his dorky t-shirts and hipster glasses.

Leonard: They are in a group, I'm scared.

Amy: None of us majored in bird shuing.

Sheldon: Bernadette, don't be a hero.

Sheldon: Slowly and quietly, flush him down the toilet.

Bernadette: Pet the bird you big baby!

Sheldon: Ok, now flush him!

Leonard: That is kind of between me and ... Laura.

Leonard: You thought cold wars were only fought in winter.

Leonard: Spell Asthma!

Penny: A S ... take me home.

Sheldon: If you were a dove, I'd call you Lovey Dovey!

Amy: One of the test monkeys slipped on a banana peel and broke his neck.

Sheldon: I already ordered 20lbs of bird seed off of Amazon.

Leonard: Sex is off the table?

Penny; Way off!

Leonard: I'm putting sex back on the table.

Sheldon: I'm going to be a Mommy!

The Big Bang Theory Quotes from "The Isolation Permutation"

On tonight's episode of CBS' THE BIG BANG THEORY, titled The Isolation Permutation, Amy is crushed when Bernadette and Penny go shopping for wedding dresses without her and Sheldon learns the fine art of cuddling.

Here we go with the quotes:

Bernadette: If you don't mind looking like an orange traffic cone, then great.

Sheldon: The quality of dinner conversation in this apartment has declined... Penny.

Amy: Sometimes you forget I'm a lady.

Sheldon: She came down to borrow a cup of mad cow disease.

Howard: What guy knows what a sweetheart neckline is?

Leonard: I'd be a great jockey if I weren't too tall, or scared of horses.

Sheldon: Leonard you may be the wisest of us all.

Sheldon: Who said Amy was eaten by a bobcat?

Amy: Everybody hurts, everybody cries. Sometimes.

Leonard: I'm single, I don't need this crap.

Sheldon: Word on the street is a bobcat was spotted...

Sheldon: Did you fail to offer them a beverage?

Sheldon: Ours is a relationship of the mind.

Sheldon: I will gently stroke your head and say ah, poor Amy.

Amy: We cuddle, final offer.

Amy: I'm just sayin' second base is right there.

Leonard: The Indian monopoly man?

Sheldon: I was strong armed into an evening of harp music and spooning.

Sheldon: My Lego fun time.

Sheldon: I'm a man of science, not someone's snuggle buddy.

Bernadette: They are all about getting naked and washing each other.

Penny: The three menstrateers.

Amy: Come on tumor, come on tumor. 

Amy: One of these things should die alone.

Amy: ... The semester abroad in Norway all over again.

Bernadette: Penny, tell her she's not a tumor.

Sheldon: Ahoy.

Sheldon: Amy is drunk in a liquor store parking lot.

Amy: Hey cuddles.

Sheldon: Yes, cuddles, we cuddled.  Shut up Leonard.

Amy: Finally someone found second base.

Amy: Like in Norway when my friends trapped me in a sauna with a horny otter.

Amy: We'll paint fertility symbols on Bernadette's naked body.

Amy: I'm sorry are you the maid of honor?

Amy: What are you a nun?  C'mon bestie, let's see some skin.

Amy: Not Penny beautiful, but beautiful.

The Big Bang Theory Quotes from "The Good Guy Fluctuation"

A cute comic book artist puts Leonard and Priya's relationship to the test, while Sheldon tries to scare the guys for Halloween.

Here are the quotes:

Sheldon: I say "yawn"

Sheldon: The most frightening thing is the missing comma!

Raj: I had pee his pants!

Leonard: We're all winners.

Leonard; That was pretty droll.  With a hint of ammonia.

Sheldon: I'm Texas through and through.  Ask Mexico.

Leonard; Alice, that makes more sense than penis.

Penny: It's a rough month when Halloween and PMS hit at the same time.

Leonard: I'm from New jersey.

Sheldon: Be a lamb and check.

Sheldon: I tried to scare an Indian with a snake.

Penny: I'd offer you Halloween candy but that's gone.

Leonard: There were too many tongues in my mouth.

Sheldon: Science, you wouldn't understand.

Sheldon: I've read all the great moral philosophers including Dr. Suess.

Leonard: Alice is the stuff I want to do.

Sheldon: Tropicana, no pulp.

Sheldon: Isn't hypochondria a common idiosyncrasy of Jewish people?

Leonard: I was going to be a jack-ass but I stopped myself.

Leonard: I don't deserve you, what do you mean everybody?

Leonard: You messed up a lot.

Sheldon: Bazinga punk now we're even!

The Big Bang Theory Quotes From 'The Infestation Hypothesis'

A fight between Penny and Sheldon has Amy Farrah Fowler caught in the middle and Raj and Wolowitz kiss.

Here are the quotes:

Sheldon: A Dinfast date.

Sheldon: A fellow in Kansas with an enormous ball of twine.

Sheldon: When I rise to power those people will be sterilized.

Sheldon: If we were an old married couple the wife would be serving iced tea and snickerdoodles.

Sheldon: it's a chair worthy of the name.

Raj: This is one good looking panini.

Howard: Does that include doing the cyber nasty?

Howard; The digital pickle tickle?

Raj: A fancy guy with a turban that grew up with Kama Sutra coloring books.

Leonard: Chicken nuggets you were sure they were human nuggets

Penny: My couch, I found half a hot pocket in there.

Leonard: It's like living with a Chihuahua.

Sheldon: So they may remove the chair of death.

Leonard: You're a dirty, disgusting, revolting girl!

Priya: Here I am baby, you miss these?

Sheldon: I'm trying to stream a movie on Netflix in here.

Amy: Besties, BFF's sisters who would share traveling pants.

Sheldon: You mean like Salt Lake City

Howard: See, internet kissing.

Raj: I was being playful.

Amy: Something in the chair is biting my tushy

Raj: What kind of an idiot throws out a terrific chair like this?

The Big Bang Theory Quotes From 'The Skank Reflex Analysis'

A new season of The Big Bang Theory.  The gang deals with the aftermath of the shocking sexual hookup that ended season four.  What will they do?  Also, Sheldon takes control of the guy's paintball team.
Here are the quotes:

Sheldon: It''s not what it looks like.

Sheldon: I can't, so I shant!

Sheldon: The worms crawl out of the rectum for air.

Sheldon: Penny could've been inspecting Raj's anal region for parasites.

Raj: I'm Penny's #2 choice after Bernadette

Sheldon:  I've decided my rank should be captain.

Leonard: Oh Bernadette, please play my clarinet.

Sheldon: By the way, I do have genitals.

Amy: I've heard who you did.

Penny: Dr. Jeckyl and Mrs. Whore

Amy: She engaged in interspecies hanky panky, but people still call her great.

Amy: The Skank Reflex!

Leonard's Mom: Buck up!

Leonard's Mom: Buck up sissy pants!

Penny: I got a call back for hemorrhoid commercial

Amy: Try to keep it in your pants, ok.

Raj: Hall & Oates, Katrina and the Waves and three-fifths of Kajagoogoo

Penny: Oh God, did you pull some weird Indian crap on me.

Raj: I'm always packing.

Raj: Can I say I ruined you for white men?

Sheldon: Whenever you are ready AT&T!

Raj: Screw you, that was a beautifully written penis metaphor.

Sheldon: Jamba Juice is for heroes

Sheldon: Following in the footsteps of Kirk, Crunch and Kangaroo.

Sheldon: if there's ever a church of Sheldon, this is where it started.

Sheldon: With my last breathe, I awarded myself a battlefield promotion.

Penny: What ya doing, Quick Draw?

Sheldon: Have you ever thought of teaching physics?

Commercial: The H is for her.