Big Bang Theory Quotes from "The Shiny Trinket Manuever"

Penny helps Sheldon when he gets in trouble with Amy.  Will Howard and Bernadette have children?  
Here are the quotes:

Raj: Ordinary, but I bet it's dripping with magical potential.

Raj: There's a seat on the Hogwart's Express with your name on it.

Sheldon: Ryan Reynolds was a better choice for Green Lantern than...

Sheldon: Billy Sparks put a Mexican Peso up my nose.  It's still there.

Penny: Pasadena's favorite power couple: Shamey.

Sheldon: Somebody just hit 100 Twitter followers.

Sheldon: i can be overly fond of Koala Bears.

Sheldon: Biology is all about yucky squishy things.

Sheldon: She knows my Koala face.

Howard: The only wand that ever saw any action was this one.

Mrs. Wolowitz: She has a tricky figure, she's short and stacked, like me.

Sheldon: Think I'll go in this saloon and drink my troubles away.

Leonard: Digital alcohol is never a solution.

Leonard: I'm no expert in women.

Bernadette: Do you know how to pipe down?

Bernadette: No cake for you!  Anyone else want to join the no cake club?

Howard: I think my crotch is starting to curdle.

Bernadette; Let's see how you like this waffle!

Sheldon: Maybe she wants a man with a pocket watch.

Penny: Trust me, we are not a couple.

Raj: I often pictured you guiding a young boy into manhood.

Howard: Even Donkey Kong had Donkey Kong Jr.

Penny: That pocket watch is ridiculous.

Amy: We both know that is you Koala face!

Amy: Oh it's a tiara!

Howard: What is that behind your ear, it's a condom.

Big Bang Theory Quotes from "The Pulled Groin Extrapolation"

Leonard goes to a wedding as Amy's date and Howard and Bernadette spend the weekend with Mrs. Wolowitz.

Here are the quotes:

Shelton:  I've seen pictures of your mother, keep eating.

Howard: When I say honey, I mean my fiance'

Penny: I'm not driving him.

Amy: Leonard please, I don't need the running commentary.

Amy:  Now I'm thinking about what I read.

Sheldon:  I'm going in with an open mind.  It's "O" gauge or no gauge.

Howard: She actually has hair on her chinny chin chin.

Amy: How was your shower?

Amy: I'm like a possum.

Leonard: Rough night Casey Jones?

Sheldon: You said there would be other scientists there my age.

Mrs. Wolowitz: In or out, we don't need bugs!

Mrs. Wolowitz: After all your sleep overs with the little brown boy...

Sheldon: The smaller the train, the more concentrated the fun.

Amy: When you are done copping a feel, that goes on my wrist.

Sheldon: I'm an HO trainiac!

Mrs Wolowitz: Hubba, Hubba

Amy: I'm being a delight here.

Leonard: I'm fun.

Mrs. Wolowitz:  The eagle has landed.

Howard: And we have splashdown.

Amy: Hokey Pokey is the young man's game.

Amy: I accidently made Leonard fall in love with me.

Amy: The perfect combination of Madonna and whore.

Amy: Leonard just doesn't get my motor running.

Amy: This body is never going to be his wonderland.

Leonard: My groin is a little worse for wear.

Howard: Good morning Mom.

Bernadette: He wants butter!

The Big Bang Theory Quotes From ''The Wiggly Finger Catalyst"

What's with Raj?  He's now talking to girls?

Here are the quotes:

Howard: Hey Ma, what's for dinner?

Howard: Playing nerd game with us and then taking a suspiciously long shower?

Sheldon:  When you play Chutes and Ladders, do you complain about all the chutes?

Howard: Eat another pie, you'll have your own bazongas.

Penny: My bikini region is fine.

Bernadette: Raj came along and ate half the samples.

Sheldon: I've decided to make all trivial decisions with a role of the dice.

Sheldon: A side of corn succotash.

Howard:  i don't want to show any more of your friends I can fit into the booster seats.

Raj: Was she signing it sarcastically?

Raj: Maybe, whatever babe.

Sheldon: C'mon hot fudge sundae.

Raj: Did you hear the one about.... no, you didn't.

Raj: Ask her how many kids she wants.

Raj: Tell her I talk like James Earl Jones.

Raj: When I was six, I tried to start a boy band called Frankie Goes to Bollywood.  The servants had to be the backup dancers.

Howard: The puppy died, he choked on a doll head, stop smiling!

Howard: I'm the make out king.

Raj: I was so smooth on that date.

Sheldon: The dice told me what percentage of my face to shave.

Leonard: You left out, got chaffed testicles since you no longer wear underpants.

Leonard: Deaf women can't be gold diggers?

Sheldon: I realized one of my dreams and was made a notary public.

Sheldon: They are "Richie Rich" rich.

Howard: Bernadette doesn't mind where I get my motor running, as long as I park it in the right garage.

Raj: You can't stand to see me with another woman.

Penny: He is cuter now that i know he is rich.

Raj's Dad:  I'm a gynaecologist, I know what she gives you.

Raj:  Sometimes i put the TV on mute to pretend she's still with me.  I can't wash the closed caption without crying.

Sheldon: Papa needs to void his bladder.

Penny: We all know you are loaded now.

Big Bang Theory Quotes from "The Zarnecki Incursion"

I should've posted this back when the episode first aired earlier this spring.  But, better late than never as this is the BBT episode airing tonight.

Can't wait a new season is right around the corner.

Here are the quotes:

Sheldon:  They stole everything Leonard!

Sheldon:  And all my gold!

Sheldon:  Like a carcass in the desert sun.  Plus the FBI hung up on me.

Sheldon:  Glenn, the only bird I've ever loved.

Leonard:  Not the kind with access to drugs.

Sheldon:  How are you allowed to carry a gun.

Sheldon:  Can you refer me to a rogue ex-cop?

Sheldon:  What kind of world do we live in where another man would steal a battle ostrich.

Sheldon:  See if Raj is done with Pilates.

Raj:  He appears to be a member of the Nigerian Royal Family.

Sheldon:  Doodle Jump is a game, Angry Birds is a game.

Raj:  Bad news, the Nigerian Prince may be a fraud.

Penny:  Leonard was so phobic about stepping on medical waste I had to carry him to the ocean.

Amy:  I'm drunk

Penny:  Oh boy, my breast friends.

Penny:  No, but I can name all the Kardashians.

Bernadette:  I don't have a need to fling my waste.

Howard:  Our troll just walked in!

Raj:  He could lose his HBO and all their delightful original programming.

Priya:  It's nice to date a boy trapped in a man's body.

Bernadette:  Count your blessings you're not a Tanzanian chimp.

Sheldon:  I never said these words before but good work Howard.

Sheldon:  The name and address drip with evil.

Sheldon:  It's in a cul-du-sac, we can box him in.

Sheldon:  Fine, we'll abide by the Geneva convention.

Sheldon:  Tonight we take back our dignity.

Raj:  i have a hip hop aerobics class at 5.  Can we go after?

Raj:  C'mon on man  Bros before....my sister.

Howard:  She's kind of a "Wheel" savant.

Raj:  Sitar music for a ring tone is not cool.

Howard: It's her super-power, that and jiggling her arm fat.

Sheldon:  Shamu is literally tons of fun.

Raj:  Legoland is more interactive.

Sheldon:  This say Beyonce bootylischious dance mix.

Raj:  She's curvy and she owns it, I like that.

Leonard:  Next time we go to kick someone's ass, we take the train.

Sheldon:  No weapon strikes more fear than a Klingon Bat leth.

Sheldon:  I'm Sheldor of Azaroth.

Raj:  Legoland seems like a hollow dream now.

Sheldon:  Todd Zarnecki was mean.

Penny:  I'm going to show you how we finish a quest in Nebraska.

Penny:  Today's the day a girl is finally going to touch you in your special place.

The Big Bang Theory Quotes from "The Cohabitation Formulation"

Wolowitz finds himself having to choose between Bernadette and his mother and Leonard has another encounter with Raj's sister Priya

Wolowitz: I do get carried away sometimes.

Bernadette:  You sound a little like a drunken monkey.

Wolowitz: My Mother needs me in the morning.

Bernadette: I think a woman can put on a wig by herself.

Wolowitz: Sex criminals don't have keys, Mom.

Mrs. Wolowitz: I know what that means. I watch Dr. Phil.

Wolowitz: Nobody has any diseases!

Mrs. Wolowitz: Is that what you want, to give your Mother herpes?

Leonard:  Still arguing over which CSI is the best?

Sheldon:  I'm upset we have an unannounced house guest, cocoa, Leonard.

Leonard:  That's a real pickle, bye.

Sheldon:  That's what tertiary friends are for.

Raj:  I forbidid it.

Raj:  You may talk in the bedroom, but I want this door to remain open.

Raj: I forbid you to hold hands.

Sheldon: The Hindu code of manu is very clear in these manners.

Sheldon: Leonard and Penny used to do the dance with no pants.

Raj:  Penny, why did you get disenchanted with Leonard as a lover?

Bernadette: If you Mom's nose holds up, we get to spend two nights together.

Amy Farrah Fowler:  Let's talk about Priya, that man stealing bitch.

Penny:  What do you mean, more suitable?

Amy Farrah Fowler: You are a community college drop out who wrote the book on tipping cows.

Wolowitz: I choose you.

Raj:  I'd love that.  Everybody in India says it the same way.

Sheldon:  If pepperoni was an explosive substance you would replace German Shepherds at out nation's airports.

Amy Farrah Fowler:  Who are you kidding, she's breathtaking.

Sheldon:  You get the part.

Sheldon:  Given the state of your career, can you afford to be picky?

Leonard:  What, with my tongue in your tail.

Wolowitz:  You got any string cheese?

Wolowitz:  I get little red bumps on my tookus.

Mrs Wolowitz:  Remember to floss, we have the dentist in the morning.

Amy Farrah Fowler: Now let's get these electrodes attached.

Sheldon:  It's actually Thai, you're slipping.

Amy Farrah Fowler:  What up Bestie!

Sheldon:  I'm sorry, it's not optional.